Author |
Topic: Magic Carpet Ride |
Lord Asaki |
posted 03-17- 05:34 CT (US)
Wee! Everybody jump on!!! |
Akuma |
posted 03-17- 13:11 CT (US)
*lights a match and torches the carpet* now don't be so silly
:) |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-17- 14:20 CT (US)
Thanks! It's even more fun when there's flames all
around you. Come on, hop on! It's safe! Just use your imagination! *Pats
out a fire that starts on his pant leg* There's nothing to fear, I swear!
*Pulls out a mini-radio that just keeps playing "Magic Carpet Ride" over
and over again* You don't know what we could
find...whoohoo! |
Steppenwolf |
posted 03-17- 18:02 CT (US)
*Jumps on the carpet* Come one guys! It's great!
Wwwoooaaahhh!!! *Pats out a fire starting on his bellbottoms* There's
nothing to worry about! Wwweeeeee!!! Born to be wi--eh, I mean--du du du
du du du du...on a magic carpet ride...du du du... |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-17- 18:05 CT (US)
Woah! This is even better than that old Yellow
Submarine movie! You guys really should try it! Wwwoooaaahhh!!! *Almost
loses balance* Hey dude, watch out for that guy right there! I think he
wants a ride... |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-17- 18:08 CT (US)
Hey guys, need some...um...adult
beverages? |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-17- 18:09 CT (US)
Sure, hop on! |
Akuma |
posted 03-18- 04:28 CT (US)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA |
Akuma |
posted 03-18- 04:29 CT (US)
*tries to jump on, misjudges the speed and misses, bruising his
backside* d'oh |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-18- 05:38 CT (US)
Hey, I think that guy back there wanted on too, lets
slow down for him. |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-18- 05:41 CT (US)
Okie dokie, or whatever. *Slows down the carpet to a
reasonable speed that all can agree on, then watches Samual Adams pat out
a fire that started on his pant leg, then notices that his own pants have
become shorts* Um...maybe we sould put out this fire. *Flies through a
nearby fountain and comes back... |
Akuma |
posted 03-18- 20:20 CT (US)
*picks himself up, hops on* wheeeeeeeee! *they speed
up* wahoooooooo! *he falls off* D'OH! |
Renegade |
posted 03-19- 06:38 CT (US)
You have to HOLD onto the magic carpet. Duh, and I know this
because?? |
Renegade |
posted 03-19- 06:40 CT (US)
BECAUSE *Renegade picks up a GIANT sp0rk!, He lifts the sp0rk way up high
so everyone can see it, It shimmers in the sun, It slams it down his
hardest on the magic carpet stopping it in his tracks and making the
people ride it fall through the air and slam into the wall*... Watta
mess. |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-19- 10:49 CT (US)
Ungh...I...I...think I'm alive...how 'bout you
guys? |
Steppenwolf |
posted 03-19- 10:52 CT (US)
...Um...my radio busted! No more music! Oh well. NO!!!
The beer bottles all got smashed! NO!!! I'll kill that bastard! *Runs
after Renegade.* |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-19- 10:56 CT (US)
...I think I died...no wait, I can't be dead, I died a
long time ago...but that would mean that I AM dead...um...I have to be
going...*He picks up a broken bottle and chases after
Renegade* |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-19- 11:04 CT (US)
*Seeing noplace left to go, Asaki hops into the Mark V
and speeds down the street, eventually catching up to Racer X, who is
really Asaki's brother's friend's cousin's uncle's landlord's wife's
father who mysteriously dissapeared and began secretly racing under the
disguise of Racer X. Suddenly Max Damage and Die Anna from Carmageddon
catch up to him and try to run him off the road. Asaki pushes a button and
makes a quick u-turn while Max and Die continue to run over pedestrians.
Asaki catches up to Renegade and runs over Steppenwolf and Samual Adams.
As he draws ever nearer to Renegade...* |
Renegade |
posted 03-19- 20:48 CT (US)
:: disappears into this air! :: oh no! His l33t sp0rk gives him
POWER! |
figment |
posted 03-20- 02:12 CT (US)
Appears out of no where and wonders whats going on after hearing the story
he reaches into his pocket and pulls out....His MAGIC SALMON and waves it
in the air re-opening the previously closed magic SPORKal portal so that
all may continue the merry chasing down of renegade for smashing the
um..adult bevarages!!
|
MERL1N |
posted 03-20- 02:14 CT (US)
merl1n walks past, sees all this nonsense and says "you guys have
issues"* |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-20- 14:39 CT (US)
*Asaki, riding on his black horse, clad in leather,
begins catching up to the newly reappeared Renegade and all of a sudden
MetallicA's The Four Horsemen starts playing and three other black horses,
clad in leather, ride up along side him. On the horses are Steppenwolf,
Samual Adams, and Jaymz Hetfield. They all sing along and gallop after the
smasher of bottles of cool, frosty, refreshing Samual Adams Beer. As they
ride they each slowely pour themselves a glass and mutter "All in due
time"... |
Renegade |
posted 03-20- 14:48 CT (US)
::Renegade runs from the angry mob:: That magic carpet was EVIL! It ran
over my dog. |
MERL1N |
posted 03-20- 17:00 CT (US)
*merl1n runs after renegade, who is distrought of his lovers death*
only joking :) |
Agent
Lime |
posted 03-20- 20:13 CT (US)
*Agent Lime walks by and says "Hey... I have no idea what is going on
here... but I want IN on it!" Agent Lime picks up a piece of the broken
bottles and joins the chase after renegade* |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-20- 21:00 CT (US)
Ha, ha, ha!!! You're outnumbered! What are you gonna
do now, call for mommy? |
figment |
posted 03-20- 23:55 CT (US)
Sticks his thumb out to hitch a ride with one of the horseman and is
promptly trampled luckily his MAGIC SALMON survives and brigns him back to
life. He summons an M1 Abraham tank to try and chase down the horseman and
renegade while sipping from his bottle of Vodka and ushering war cries
form The lord of the rings trilogy. |
Agent
Lime |
posted 03-21- 11:47 CT (US)
Agent Lime blinded by his pursuit of renegade accidentaly steps on the
flaming magic carpit and instantly bursts into flames. Agent Lime runs
around in circles screaming "I'm on fire!" until figment runs him over
with his tank. Luckily figment's MAGIC SALMON has sympathy for a fellow
pursuee, and revives him. The SALMON exclaims "WOW two revivals within 10
minutes... these idiots should be more careful." |
Renegade |
posted 03-21- 11:50 CT (US)
*Runs down the street screaming like an idiot while people watch pointing
and laughing, Renegade trips and falls on his face and tears pour out of
his eyes, he wipes em away and begins to run screaming now "I NEED HELP!
HELP ME! NOO! AHH!" He makes a turn and jumps in a bush
and..* |
Akuma |
posted 03-21- 12:28 CT (US)
*Akuma leaps out* Renagade! Renegade? *searches for Ren* *hears a
rustle in the bushes* What's that rustling in the bushes? *finds
Renegade* *the ugly mob catches finds them, and Akuma frantically looks
around him* Come on, Renegade, we'll fight them to the bitter
end! *Akuma, possessed by an ancient Japanese demon, fights the
bloodthirsty alcoholics, side by side with Renegade. They fight like
Avenging Angels, tearing into the raging gang of hoodlums* Aaaaahaha!
C'mon! That all you got?! |
FrikaC |
posted 03-21- 12:49 CT (US)
In a nearby building, FrikaC is hard at work preparing the finest of
cuisine. 'Le Fromage de Fricassee'. From his kitchen window, he hears the
below comotion. Dashing to it, he sees Renegade hiding behind a bush. He
calls out to his friend below, then tosses down his mighty, cheese
encrusted, sp0rk of destruction.
"Good luck my friend!"
|
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-21- 20:04 CT (US)
*Asaki tries to attack the two, but is distracted by
the cheese on the sp0rk.* Mmm...cheese... *He is almost
hynotized.* |
Renegade |
posted 03-21- 20:27 CT (US)
*Renegade pulls back his arm... SMASH!!!!!! Lord Askai is down! Renegade
turns his head to see Akuma kicking butt* |
MERL1N |
posted 03-21- 20:39 CT (US)
*merl1n finally catches up to the melee, and, after a 5min 'get the breath
back' period, he walks up to akuma and boots him in the ass, then falls
over laughing histerically* |
Doggy
1205 |
posted 03-21- 21:38 CT (US)
*Dog runs up to the crowd, barking, and notices the cheese. Yells "Is the
cheese cheddar!?" and forgets about ripping MERL1N's leg off and puts his
mind on the cheese, in awe that it looks alot like, and very well could
be, cheddar...* |
Akuma |
posted 03-22- 12:21 CT (US)
*Akuma takes advantage of MERL1N's hysterical state, and kicks him in the
face* Haha! Take THAT ya big fat wizard guy :P
*grabs the cheese from the sp0rk and throws it on Asaki's head* Go
eat the cheese, boy! |
Doggy
1205 |
posted 03-22- 12:28 CT (US)
*Goes to get the cheese on Asaki's head* Oops, I meant to get the
CHEESE, not the HEAD... *Runs back with the head still dangling in his
mouth, jumps over Asaki, grabs the cheese and tries to put the head back
on, but only shoves it down Asaki's throat.* Oh well, I got my cheese!
:) |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-22- 15:17 CT (US)
*Magically puts the severed head back into place.*
Hey! That was -my- cheese! *Suddenly the Magic Carpet flies past and Asaki
hops on. The Carpet flies towards FrikaC's window and Asaki runs in, grabs
a few blocks of Colby Jack, then hears Renegade "Help me and Akuma!".
Asaki crams the cheese down his throat and leaps through the open window,
landing on Doggy and rendering him unconscious. Then he pulls out his
Mystical Samual Adams Beer Bottle O' Frostyness and smashes it over
Merl1n's head. Renegade slips Asaki a 20 and Asaki heads back toward the
war grounds.* |
nemo_redrum |
posted 03-22- 15:22 CT (US)
i swear...
i leave you guys
alone for five
minutes... (or maybe a little
longer
than
that, hehe)
well i really can't explain, except to say i've been off-line all this time and i've lost everything due to a hd fail. anaway i've got alot of catching-up to do and a 1000 emails to respond to, so i'd better run. *nemo resurrects asaki and punts the pooch on his way
out*
nemo |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-22- 15:22 CT (US)
*Samual Adams begins to dance a little jig, soon
after Steppenwolf and Jaymz join him in the dancing of the cerimonious Jig
of Battle.* |
Agent
Lime |
posted 03-22- 16:53 CT (US)
*Agent Lime arrives late and says "Whoa... sorry I'm late. What did I
miss?" Agent Lime then immediately gets poked in the arm by a SPORK. Agent
Lime then pulls out his amazing BATTLE AXE and starts randomly hacking and
cuting his way through the massive bloodfest.* |
noodle |
posted 03-22- 17:04 CT (US)
<----- wonders how long the magic carpet ride will last. He doesn't
care to get off. He would rather be in peace forever, but Agent Lime's
Battle axe was too much. KERPLUNK! There goes Agent Lime, after Noodle
Waylayed his ass. All of the sudden Noodle's eyes open and there is Agent
Lime Hovering above him. Ohh No it was all just a dream and Now Noodle is
just scared shitless. He feels a warm tingle running down his leg. Agent
Lime sees it to and begins to laugh. The threat of the Battle Axe was
diffused by the embarrasing moment of pissing on my own leg. Jeesh
:0p |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-22- 19:40 CT (US)
*Asaki fights his way up the wet starway, sword
against sword, sword against flesh. He feels the rain patter against his
chain mail as he slashes the final throat, casting a mist of red through
the air. He stops to wipe off his blade on a pile of wet leaves and tilts
his head to glance at the advancing army behind him. He quickly sheaths
his sword and pushes open the heavy oak doors of the monastery. Closing
them shut behind him, he runs towards the fridge and comes out with two
large blocks of Colby Jack cheese. Snarfing them down in a matter of
seconds, he unbolts the door and yanks open the doors, watching the
unsuspecting pesants run in fear away from the dead bodies.* Oh yeah, I
was supposed to be fighting some Quakers...duh! *He leaves his sword in
the monastery and grabs an empty beer bottle on the way out. To the south
he notices a man lauging at some peasant who had wet his pants. Seizing
the moment, he gives Agent Lime a swift (but painful) kick in the nuts.
Giggling, he heads back to help Renegade and get some more money...yeah,
that's it, money. What? Bribes? No way! ;)* |
ParisMage |
posted 03-22- 19:47 CT (US)
Hi every body!! |
Doggy
1205 |
posted 03-22- 19:49 CT (US)
Oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.... MY CHEESE! Now you've pushed me to
the limit. *Dog rips Asaki limb from limb, putting an anti-revival
curse on him afterwards.* REVIVE YERSELF AFTER THAT! THAT'S WHAT YOU
GET FOR TAKING MY CHEESE YOU CHEESE-STEALING BUGGER YOU! As for
Merl1n... *Dog grabs his magic
Battle-Dog-Bone-That-Can-Kick-Anyone's-Ass™ and wh00ps up on
Merl1n* Ah haa haa! W00F! |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-22- 20:01 CT (US)
*Asaki revives himself, and while he's at it he heals
MERL1N as well.* Ha ha! I didn't steal any cheese (well, besides
FrikaC's)! That was MY cheese, and my SPECIAL REVIVING AFTER ANY CURSES
COLBY JACK CHEESE! Your dog-like powers are useless against me! Mwa ha ha
ha ha!!! *Asaki summons a giant rolled up newspaper and instructs it to
chase after Doggy. Then he gets back to the cheese eating, killing,
drinking, killing, etc...* |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-22- 20:09 CT (US)
*Sam, Steppenwolf, and Jaymz continue to dance their
Jigg of Battle, a little faster now.* |
MERL1N |
posted 03-22- 22:26 CT (US)
*merl1n stands up in the middle of all the action, pulls out a laptop
(from where i dunno :P) and goes to the i3d websyte, trying to hack thru
to the msg brd... but the string is so long, by the time it is downloaded
he has dozed off* |
Doggy
1205 |
posted 03-22- 22:39 CT (US)
Ahaa! Your newspaper is no match for my
Battle-Dog-Bone-That-Can-Kick-Anyone's-Ass™! SO THERE! /Me goes
into my doghouse, and goes into the
Trap-Door-Below-The-Doghouse-That-Leads-To-Safety™. Weeble
wobble wibble woo.
|
figment |
posted 03-23- 02:53 CT (US)
Figment crashes through the bush with his M1 Abraham brandishing his magic
SALMON like the Quake Ax. He jumps from his tank and wallops everyone on
the head "You should all be ashamed! this was supposed to be a fun
peacefull, drunken Magic carpet ride instead you all turned it into a
bloodfest..." He then thinks about what he said "oh yea we all play too
much Quake." Shrugs, jumps on his tank and starts firing mortar shells and
HEMs into the crowd while downing a bottle of tequilla rose. |
Akuma |
posted 03-23- 12:15 CT (US)
*FrikaC wakes up, and it was all a dream; typical of his warped
mind* |
MERL1N |
posted 03-23- 14:52 CT (US)
*merl1n wakes up inside frika-c's head...*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
not the scary duracell bunny place!!! noooooo!!! |
noodle |
posted 03-23- 14:55 CT (US)
Noodle's own bodily fluid diminishies the threat of the inferno on the
carpet. He immediatly strips and dives into a near by pond. While bathing
(no not playing with himself just bathing), Noodle begins to feel a surge
of energy running through his bones. When out of the sky he hears a voice,
"You have waded in the sacred pool of youth. You shall never grow old, and
this pool shall never cast its youth upon any one again."
Noodle
dries himself off and puts his clothes back on. He suddenly feels an urge
for a Beer. Out of the bushes jumps the whole inside3d community. figment
is cracking open the keg. Laughter feels the air. Everyone drops their
rocket launchers and misc. weapons and joins the fun. Except now that
noodle is too young to drink he becomes the scape goat of the carnival,
and soon leaves to pout and whine. Early the next morning noodle
returns to the party spot and witnesses a montage of hangovers, which
included vomitting not only on themselves but their friends as well. The
whole place reaked of piss and yesterdays digested food. And noodle
wonders why can't I ever fit in. Ohh well. :0P
PS this is getting
out of hand. heh |
FrikaC |
posted 03-23- 16:22 CT (US)
"Whoa! What a weird nightmare". FrikaC stumbles in dark toward the
kitchen. He reaches the fridge, and in the yellowish light you see a look
of utter shock and horror, for there sitting on a plate infront of him,
flops the MAGIC SALMON.
..and so concludes another edition of "Tales from the
Crypt"....
|
Akuma |
posted 03-23- 16:57 CT (US)
Anybody that posts to this thread again will bring a curse upon him and
his seed, cursing his bloodline for all infinity. So don't do it.
Starting...wait for it...NOW! |
MERL1N |
posted 03-23- 23:58 CT (US)
yeah! curse ppl! be scared....
ah damn :( |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-24- 14:50 CT (US)
*Asaki raises from his beer induced sleep.* Curse, eh?
What kind of curse? |
noodle |
posted 03-24- 17:02 CT (US)
Well, i just figured if its worth pissing on myself, its worth a
curse.
hehe
|
figment |
posted 03-25- 02:58 CT (US)
Is it one of THOSE curses? like growing eyeballs on the side of your head
so you will forever be called a freak? But you'll have 180 degrees pov,
right?
MAGIC SALMON says: This damn fridge is cold FrikaC get me outa
here!!!!!
|
Impulse |
posted 03-25- 16:01 CT (US)
wouldnt that be FOV instead??
POV is uuuuuhh something..
FOV is Field Of View..
|
Impulse |
posted 03-25- 21:19 CT (US)
Oh yeah..
*Impulse glides by everyone on his super double-deldosticizing
majorizing delux elite man's carpet.. Then it stalls, he crashes and dies*
heh
*Wait, he just got up from the wreckage. Oh wait, that was the
carpet..* |
figment |
posted 03-26- 12:21 CT (US)
Uhhhh...yeah...thats what I meant give me a break it was like 3:00am or
something...I hate those awkward situations where you feel like the
biggest idiot in the world...Damn! |
ParisMage |
posted 03-27- 17:43 CT (US)
Nell. |
Skullhammer |
posted 03-28- 15:19 CT (US)
This is definately the weirdest post to click on for the first time since
I have been gone for an extremely long time.
|
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 10:21 CT (US)
hehe... |
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 20:06 CT (US)
65th |
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 20:06 CT (US)
66th |
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 20:06 CT (US)
67th |
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 20:06 CT (US)
68th |
Impulse |
posted 03-30- 20:07 CT (US)
69th!!! |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-31- 11:54 CT (US)
70th... |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-31- 11:55 CT (US)
71st... |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-31- 11:55 CT (US)
72nd... |
Samual
Adams |
posted 03-31- 11:56 CT (US)
73rd... |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 03-31- 11:57 CT (US)
74th!!! Look at it backwards and what do you get?
47!!! Whoohoo! BOW TO 47!!! |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 04-01- 06:24 CT (US)
Actually, if you count the original post, the 68th
post would really be the 69th post, but then it wouldn't say 69 for
replies on the message board. *Asaki slaps Impulse upside the head with a
Colby Jack™ artificially flavored Cheese Log™ snack for good
measure.* |
Impulse |
posted 04-01- 13:27 CT (US)
I still got it.. |
kj |
posted 04-01- 18:09 CT (US)
My magic carpet has air conditioning and a Coke machine. Ditch this old
rag and ride in style. |
Lord
Asaki |
posted 04-01- 19:39 CT (US)
Oh yeah? MINE has anti-lock breaks, rack-and-pinion
steering, a FAYGO machine, and ALL the Colby Jack™ flavored Cheese Log™
brand snacks you can eat!!! |
ParisMage |
posted 04-03- 16:40 CT (US)
Did I hear snacks? |
GBLW |
posted 04-03- 16:57 CT (US)
Did I hear FAYGO?! :) Red Pop, please
--GBLW
|
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