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volume 1, issue 35

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Thinking Outside the Box:
The All-Pic Issue

By Paul "Villam" Steed

Anything I say comes from me and represents my personal opinions, views and subtle plans for influencing society. Read, ruminate over and remember at your own risk. If I teach you something and it helps, teach someone else.

ell, I had planned on doing something educational this time out since I dissed you last time. Alas, I’m copping the Q3 plea again. But rather than give a completely empty-handed ‘thank you’ for clicking on this here area of LG I give you…PIKTURES! WhoooHooo!

I want to give you an idea of the kind of environment I have to endure amongst the legends here at id (John, Kev, and Adrian) when I hammer some instruction out to you students of the verti-sea. To start with, here’s the door you walk through to get to the goods…the dwarves smithy where magical stuff is being pounded out on an hourly basis…

For ambient background music on our little sojourn, hum the ‘Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood’ tune. Okay?

For you trivia buffs, Romero changed the actual number of suite 615 to 666 in order to scare the Christian Advocacy center a couple floors down from us.

Next up you’ll encounter the id Momma, Ms. Donna. Unfortunately she forbade me taking her picture but just remember this about her if you come by. Ms. Donna is a born and bred Mesquite native who drag races her Mustang with us when we hit the track. Her niceness and maternal instincts for us are beaten only by her toughness in our defense. Don’t mess with her. She has a bat signal that sends me up to her desk in a buzz (I’m about ten feet away).

Hanging around the lobby of Ms. Donna’s desk, though you’ll see some id-like stuff to peruse. First there’s the iron id logo hanging on the wall to your right…

Then there’s the trophy case to your left…

Next, take a look down the hall and you’ll see articles printed about id products mounted and framed on the wall. I STILL geek out over these things when I walk by them…

Next, here’s our anger management facility in the form of weights and a punching bag.

I’m up to benching 95 pounds now as you can see on the bench and I hope to be at a hundred before summer hits! So as we continue the tour let’s check in on my fellow idsters. Look! It’s Brian Hook hard at work doing…whatever a Brian Hook does!

Then it’s Paul Jaquays, former dragon slayer turned map-maker…

Uh, Paul’s a really big guy so we don’t want to bother him too much…Let’s bother Tim Willits!

Next is Kenneth Scott, skinner and modeling whelp extraordinaire…

Right next to Kenneth is Christian Antkow (aka Disruptor)! Yeah!

And look who’s visiting Disruptor, kids…it’s Brandon ‘Killme’ James! Yeahhh!

(Oops, guess we caught Brandon at a bad time) Phew! I’m getting a little parched drumming up all this enthusiasm from my fellow employees so let’s go get something to drink from the break area. Here we have snacks…

And we have plenty of Diet Coke for the programmers (they get bitchy without it)…

So let’s get to my office where I write Thinking Outside the Box, shall we?

(Continued on next page)

Credits: Thinking Outside the Box logo illustrated and is © 1999 Dan Zalkus. Thinking Outside the Box is © 1999 Paul Steed. All other content is © 1999 loonyboi productions. Unauthorized reproduction is strictly prohibited, so don't even try it. We've got really big guns, and we're ripped, baby.