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        <h1><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><i><a href="../../index.html">loonygames</a><br>
          <font size="1">a <a href="http://www.bluesnews.com">blue's news</a> 
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<p><a href="../2.1/pipe/index.html">&lt;&lt; Back to Normal View</a></p>
<p>URL: <a href="../2.1/pipe/index.html">http://www.loonygames.com/content/2.1/pipe/</a><br>
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<p>&nbsp;</p>Vol. 
                2, Issue 1<br>
                November 12, 1999<br>
                </b>
              <br>
              <br>
               
                <b><i>Down 
                  the Pipe</i></b></p>

                <b><i> 
                  Introductory Ramblings</i></b></p>
                by 
                  Russell &quot;RadPipe&quot; 
                  Lauzon</p>
              
              <p> 
                

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              <p>
              It 
                seems strange to sit across the river and view things from the 
                other side, yet here I sit, Features Editor for loonygames, my 
                favorite magazine on the planet. It wasn't long ago that I was 
                merely a fan sending loonyboi the &quot;loonygames is on hiatus? 
                Noooo!&quot; e-mail and not longer after that he sent me 
                the &quot;my first 10 picks declined, you want a job?&quot; e-mail. 
                I couldn't be happier.</p>
              As Features Editor it is my job 
                to pull a Cover Story out of my ass every week and thrill the 
                masses with some literary wonderment and chat with the industry 
                Gods. No small feat indeed! How will I do it? No clue. Check back 
                with me in a couple months.</p>
              This week's interview 
                with American McGee was a delight to do, and I'm not just 
                saying that. Alice is such a cool concept for a game and I love 
                the <i>Nightmare Before Christmas</i> influence in the concept 
                art. It's one of my favorite movies of all time. In fact, I think 
                I can sing every song on the soundtrack by heart. But also, the 
                game is being co-produced by one of my favorite game companies, 
                Rogue Entertainment. I can't say enough about Jim Molinets, Barrett 
                Alexander and their crew. Plus the Under 
                Cover story about Christopher Greenhaw (who did that awesome 
                cover pic), is just too amazing to forget. That boy is going places, 
                you watch. Look for more on the Rogue crew to grace the pages 
                of loonygames in the next couple of weeks.</p>
              On to bigger and bolder, and 
                I'm not talking silicon. I won't spoil all the great upcoming 
                features we have planned for loonygames, but I will say we're 
                going to CHANGE THE WAY PEOPLE IN THIS UNIVERSE THINK, BABY! Well, 
                ok, Kodos and his sister Kang are pretty much set in their ways, 
                and if anyone can get Paul Steed to consider anything new then 
                let me know, but everyone else better hold on to your hats and 
                your pants! (Hats will blow off on windy days, and loonyboi will 
                steal your pants if you let him).</p>
              If you dropped by for our IRC 
                Launch Party the other day, then you witnessed chaotic mayhem 
                at its finest. At one point I counted 150 people in the #loonygames 
                channel, no less than 3 servers were buckling under the load, 
                and our chief loonyboi couldn't get on to give his speech and 
                get things going. And, to top things 
                off, I found I am absolutely terrible at stalling. It was cool. 
                We had a lot of VIPs attend, which I was delighted to see, in 
                fact I think I'll list them here:</p>
               
                Dave Kirsch, Paul Steed, and John 
                  Cash of id Software <br>
                  John Romero, Stevie Case, and Chris Cummings 
                  of Ion Storm <br>
                  Chris Greenhaw, Rob Selitto, and Bobby Pavlock 
                  of Rogue Entertainment <br>
                  Jake Simpson, and John Scott of Raven Software 
                  <br>
                  Jim Downs of All Games Network <br>
                  Jenne &quot;Mynx&quot; Bailey of Dear Mynx 
                  <br>
                  Cliff Bleszinski and Brandon Reinhart of 
                  Epic Megagames <br>
                  Illiad of User Friendly<br>
              
            
            
              There were others (like two excellent dudes from Looking Glass) 
              but I was too drunk to write their names down. Sorry. I suggested 
              the idea of doing weekly IRC parties but people kept threatening 
              to run me up the flag pole so I dropped it.
            
              <br>Hey now, how about some background 
                info on our Radmeister? It goes against my better judgement, and 
                makes me a target for Canada's Most Wanted, but what the heck. 
                I hail from the Toronto area and I work in a pharmaceutical company 
                as a Validation Specialist. Essentially I do tons of documentation 
                in preparation for FDA audits so that we can make drugs and sell 
                them to the general public. Now doesn't that just send shivers 
                up your sphincter? I've been a professional computer techie for 
                over ten years and have loads of writing experience that I've 
                accumulated mostly on the side. I have a book published and I 


                worked briefly for Atlantis Films (now Alliance Atlantis) in Toronto 
                on an action/drama TV series. If those crazy guys at Raven ever 
                get their webzine going, then hopefully you'll see a few of my 
                pieces pop up there. I'm married. I have 3 kids (boys. Yes, I'm 
                raising a clan. No, this is not a joke).</p>
              Well I've pretty much reached 
                the end of my &quot;Here's who I am, what I do, and how jizzed 
                you'll be by upcoming Features yadda yadda&quot; talk, so let's 
                move on to a new subject. I'll title this:</p>
              &quot;How To Cook Forty Humans&quot;</p>
              If you can follow any bizarre 
                phrases like that, then, not only are we connected on some higher 
                unknown level, but you're probably a thesis subject for the white-coats 
                too. It's not all bad, though. You get a lot of attention and 
                they let you eat all the ice cream you want.</p>
              Here's an exchange I thought 
                I'd share with everyone.</p>
              
                &nbsp; 
              
              
                &lt;me&gt; I'm doing my commentary 
                  on loonygames and I need a topic. Quick, what's the most embarrassing 
                  thing on your desk? </p>
                 &lt;levelord&gt; ...got one! 
                  ...not on my desk, but on my chair, ...just between my legs 
                  where the Warrior would be if I was naked, there's a stain that 
                  looks just like, ...just like, ...well, you know, ...like I 
                  was here late one night when no one else was here and, ...well, 
                  ...you know, ...happened upon a pron page or something and, 
                  ...well, ...you know, ...made a mess? It's actually an honest 
                  catsup spill from a club sandwich that I tried to wipe up with 
                  a white napkin. The material from the napkin is now embedded 
                  in the chair and it looks a lot like a cum stain. No one believes 
                  me, especially the press when they cum, ...errrr, ...come to 
                  visit.</p>
              
              Never a dull moment when the 
                good and humble levelord is on duty. Let's dissect this little 
                gem of a message. Actually, let's not. But what a great question. 
                I'd ask someone else but I don't think I could top that. Instead, 
                I asked an IRC passerby who he would play in an upcoming movie, 
                if he had a choice. His answer:</p>
              
                &nbsp; 
              
              
                &lt;PT&gt; I've decided.. that 
                  I'm going to be Anakin in episode 2. Yep. Might as well. It'd 
                  be fun. And I'd get to snog Natalie Portman - always a good 
                  thing.</p>
              
              Ok, I'll admit, that does sound 
                like fun. But what really drew my skirt up, is this new word. 
                This &quot;snog&quot; word. Man, that's one of those new words 
                that catches me as soon as I see it. Say it for yourself. Snog. 
                I love it. I'm going to walk around all day tomorrow saying nothing 
                but snog. &quot;Hey Jim, snog lately?&quot; That's cool. Almost 
                as good as the word &quot;exhume&quot;. Try using that in an everyday 
                sentence. It actually works quite well. &quot;Yeah we're going 
                to exhume that piece of code and take another look at it.&quot; 
                I emailed John Carmack not long ago asking if he wanted to coin 
                that baby. He didn't respond. Wonder why.</p>
              Welp, that's pretty much the 
                end of this week's commentary. Next week I promise to talk about 
                interesting subjects that are actually relevant to real world 
                gaming issues, whatever those may be. In closing, I'd like to 
                leave you with one final thought, parlayed to me by a good friend 
                who <br>
                wishes to remain nameless:</p>
              
                &nbsp; 
              
              
                &lt;Good Nameless Friend&gt; 
                  One of my cats is named Poopie Eye. She has a brown eye and 
                  a blue eye.</p>
              
              Life doesn't get any better than 
                that.</p>
              <p><i>- 
                Russell &quot;RadPipe&quot; Lauzon is currently exhausting all 
                his free time researching Beer Goggles.</i><br><p>&nbsp;</p> 
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<p><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">Credits: Print CGI is 
  &copy; 2000 <a href="http://www.square8.com">Square Eight</a>. Used with permission. 
  Article is &copy; 2000 its original author. All other content is &copy; 2000 
  loonyboi productions. Unauthorized reproduction is prohibited. You got that??</font></i></p>
 