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              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC">volume 
                1, issue 41</font></b></font></p>
              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC"> 
                </font></b></font></p>
              <p>  <p><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono"><b><font color="#339900" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Today 
                in loonygames:</font></b></font></p>

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        <p align="LEFT"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0022A8"><b><a target="" href="../../corner/index.html"><font size="-1">Beaker's 
          Bent</font></a><font size="-1">:</font></b></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="+3" color="#0022A8"><br>
          The Baldur's Gate Rant</font></p>
        <p align="RIGHT"><font color="#804000"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">By 
          Rich &quot;<a target="_self" href="mailto:rich@loonygames.com">Beaker</a>&quot; 
          Wyckoff</font></b></font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Should I even go into the 
          annoying real time battle system which took the one joy out of computerized 
          AD&amp;D for me? I started to remember why I resisted the Gold Box games 
          for so long: the whole AD&amp;D system is so unsuited to the computer 
          in the first place - too few levels, too many ridiculous restrictions, 
          no skill system to speak of (the real fun in most CRPGs). Remove the 
          satisfaction of being able to carefully plant that stinking cloud in 
          the doorway and immobilizes a couple of the Hill Giants just long enough 
          for your Ranger to get up there and give them a couple good swipes with 
          his long sword, and it turns out you don't have a lot left. It still 
          seems odd that people could criticize Diablo for being a clickfest and 
          then praise <b>Baldur's Gate</b> where if you try to exert control your 
          mages lose their own spells if you give them a movement order after 
          a spell casting order. At least in Diablo you knew what each click had 
          a predictable and satisfactory result.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Just when it looked like 
          I was starting to have some fun playing the game my own way and methodically 
          hacking-and-slashing through map after map gaining xps, one or another 
          of my NPCs would decide with little warning that I had ignored their 
          quest for too long and desert, forcing me to back up to a save of several 
          game days ago and make a mad dash to satisfy their conditions before 

          they would abandon me. Meanwhile I was being driven mad by the absolutely 
          meaningless annoying vocals repeat over and over again as your semi-evil 
          characters keep saying one of their two "You suck" lines just because 
          I'd been solving little problems and gaining reputation (because of 
          course an evil character couldn't possibly be satisfied with winning 
          the game). Not to mention the aggravation of the characters going through 
          their completely predictable little exchanges about "Boy do I like/hate 
          you," with the same over-acted little snibbets that had absolutely no 
          visible impact on gameplay. I actually began to wish for Shamino and 
          Iolo begging to be fed - at least I knew that they were really hungry 
          and not just saying some lines over and over again which someone thought 
          would make them seem more "real."</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Well, of course there's the 
          "epic" plot. Kill the local bad guy, find the letter which tells you 
          who his boss is, go kill him, repeat until bored. I got bored all right, 
          bored enough to lose most of my interest probably five or so hours from 
          the finish. What really drove me over the edge and made me stop altogether 
          was when I decided to explore some of the supposedly interesting dungeons 
          before completing the game, went down to the infamous place with the 
          Kobold commandos, and ran smack into one of the best "features" of all 
          - regenerate on save! Yep, that's right - in order to discourage a standard 
          feature of games, some of the enemies secretly come back every time 
          you save (or possibly just load) the game. Nothing like clearing out 
          that tough roomful of enemies and drinking up your last healing potions 
          just to have them all pour out on you again when you start playing again 
          the next day and accidentally walk back in that direction.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I've actually been easy on 
          the game - I could fill this much space again with the rest of the annoying 
          features (why, after nearly a decade of drag and drop interfaces in 
          RPGs, would auto-stacking of similar inventory items be the kind of 
          feature that first gets implemented for the expansion disc, for crying 
          out loud?) One of my diehard but cynical RPG fan friends apparently 
          has catalogued every thing that another game has gotten right over the 
          past years but BG didn't - I decided I'd better not look or I'd never 
          be able to stop this rant.</font></p>
        <p align="right"><i><font size="-1" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">(<a href="index5.php">Continued 
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    <td><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><b>Credits:</b> 
      Beaker's Bent logo illustrated by and is &copy; 1999 Dan Zalkus. Beaker's 
      Bent is &copy; 1999 Rich Wyckoff. All other content is &copy; 1998 <a target="_self" href="http://www.loonyboi.com">loonyboi 
      productions</a>. Unauthorized reproduction is strictly prohibited, so don't 
      do it. We have ways of making you talk.</font></i></td>
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