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          <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1">- <a href="../index.html">Contents</a><br>
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              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC">volume 
                1, issue 27</font></b></font></p>
              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC"> 
                </font></b></font></p>
              <p>  <p><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono"><b><font color="#339900" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Today 
                in loonygames:</font></b></font></p>

<P><font color="#000000" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1">New!!</font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"> The Archives have been cleaned up, fead links fixed, and printable versions restored! Also, don't miss the new comments <a href="../../../index.html">on the front page</a>!</font></p>
              
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        <p align="LEFT"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0022A8"><b><a target="" href="../../columns.1"><font size="-1">From 
          the Mouth of Madness</font></a><font size="-1">:</font></b></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="+3" color="#0022A8"><br>
          Weird</font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="+3" color="#0022A8"><font size="+1"></font></font></p>
        <p align="RIGHT"><font color="#804000"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">By 
          Jason &quot;<a target="" href="mailto:jason@loonygames.com">loonyboi</a>&quot; 
          Bergman</font></b></font></p>
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        <p><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Real Sound </font></b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">(Saturn)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Chalk this one up under weird-ass 
          games that never made it to the US. :)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Kenji Eno is pretty much 
          universally acknowledged as being one hell of a game designer, although 
          most Americans probably haven't played too many of his games. That's 

          pretty much because he's a total screwball. He makes great games, but 
          if you're not open-minded, well…you'll have a tough time swallowing 
          some of these. <b>Enemy Zero</b> is a perfect example of this, with 
          its strange mix of <b>Doom</b> and FMV styles of gameplay, but the ultimate 
          proof lies in <b>Real Sound</b>.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">No, it's not an internet 
          broadcast thing…it's actually a game for the Saturn…with no graphics 
          at all. Being the old-school text adventure fan that I am, I had to 
          try this thing, so I managed to find an import copy a while back, and 
          while I can't get the most out of it (It's Japanese!) I gotta admit…it's 
          pretty damn cool. The concept is that you have to control the game without 
          graphics, but instead relying entirely on audio. There are parts of 
          this that made its way into <b>Enemy Zero</b> (and really helped strengthen 
          the game, IMHO) but this is it at its purest. If you're willing to try 
          something <i>really</i> weird…check this one out. :)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Oh, and supposedly there's 
          a sequel in the works for Sega's swanky new Dreamcast system. Sign me 
          up for a copy when it becomes available…I can't wait to try it with 
          some serious stereo support.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>ET: The Extra Terrestrial 
          </b>(Atari 2600)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Everyone who had an Atari 
          2600 knows this game, and it's really legendary…it has absolutely nothing 
          to do with the movie, and probably will stand the test of time as being 
          one of the worst movie tie-ins in videogame history. </font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Here's the idea, right: you 
          play E.T. the ever-so-cuddly alien from Steven Spielberg's movie. For 
          some reason, you’ve got to assemble the pieces for E.T.'s "phone home" 
          device before his "energy" runs out. Do that, and a giant spaceship 
          comes down and rescues him. Of course, once you've done that you get 
          some "points" and get to do it all over again.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The game's problem lies in 
          the fact that once you actually manage to finish a board, you're so 
          pissed off at Atari for making the damn thing that you don't <i>want</i> 
          to do another level. Whee. Personally, I couldn't understand why (and 
          remember, I was what…six when this game was released?) E.T. would board 
          the ship, only to have all his stuff thrown around the game again so 
          he could go get it. Sounded like hell to me…</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The legend behind this game 
          is that five million copies are buried somewhere…I'd like to go on the 
          expedition to find that site. Just to know for sure. ;)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>Nord and Bert Couldn't 
          Make Heads or Tails of It </b>(PC)</font></p>
        <table width="75" border="0" align="right">
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            <td><img src="nordnbert.jpg" width="188" height="228"></td>
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            <td>
              <div align="center"><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1">Ahh...Infocom.</font></i></div>
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        </table>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Man, do I love this game. 
          It's so hideously corny, that it's just a major boatload of fun to play. 
          Of course, I was an English major for a while…don’t trust my opinion.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>Nord and Bert</b> was 
          released towards the end of the reign of Infocom, and therefore was 
          missed by a lot of people…it's not quite as great a game as some of 
          the <b>Zork</b> titles, and it can't come near my all-time favorite, 
          <b>The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy</b>, but man…it's a wacky fun, 
          weird-ass game.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The basic idea of the game 
          is to figure out just which clich&eacute;, pun or homonym is being used 
          in each puzzle. You'll have to go to the bizarre bazaar, figure out 
          how to turn, "happy Sam into a sappy ham" and probably give yourself 
          a headache. If there ever were a "Bizarro World: The Game" this would 
          probably be its sequel. Highly recommended…if you can tolerate the cheeze, 
          and don't mind games with no graphics. :)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>Gyromite </b>(NES)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">This was the game, where 
          the first time I saw it, I actually uttered the words, "what the f#%k 
          is that?" Here's the idea. The original Nintendo Entertainment System 
          came with two controllers, a light gun, and…R.O.B the Robot. Yes, R.O.B. 
          the Robot. R.O.B. (which stands for Robotic Operating Buddy…ugh) was 
          a silly little thing thrown in to make the box really, really damn big 
          (actually it was apparently stuck in to get the NES into toy stores…but 
          I still think it’s the other reason) and only had two games made for 
          it, only one of which I ever saw. <b>Gyromite</b> was the game, and 
          jeez…was it stupid. It was kinda like a side scroller game, although 
          whenever you got to a door, you'd sit there and watch this goofy contraption 
          next to you take a bunch of chips and move them from one place to another.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Whee.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">As a result of this, the 
          game wasn't exactly…action packed. It took me and a friend of mine about 
          twenty minutes of mind-numbingly boring gameplay before we discovered 
          that it was much faster just to unplug the damn thing and use the second 
          controller to act in place of the robot. Pressing a couple of buttons 
          did the exact same thing as having this gratuitous piece of crap do 
          its schtick. Of course, once we did that, we quickly realized that without 
          the robot to impress us, there wasn't any game to be found. Yowza. And 
          how many millions of NES units were sold? This thing made me very proud 
          that I owned a Sega Master System. ;)</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Well, that's it for my lists, 
          kids…hope I managed to bring back some memories…I try. Next week I'll 
          be back with more crazy crap, so come on back! And a big thanks goes 
          out to the following sites for helping me do some last-minute fact-checking 
          in the last few weeks: <a href="http://www.classicgaming.com">ClassicGaming.com</a>, 
          <a href="http://www.atarihq.com">AtariHQ</a>, and the <a href="http://www.csd.uwo.ca/Infocom/">unofficial 
          Infocom Homepage</a>. Check those sites out…they're all great.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Oh, and feedback@ is still 
          a bit funky...keep sending e-mail to <a href="mailto:jason@loonygames.com?subject=feedback">jason@loonygames.com</a> 
          with a subject header of &quot;feedback&quot; if you want to be included 
          in our weekly MailBag roundup. Thanks!</font></p>
        <p align="right">&nbsp;</p>
        <p align="RIGHT"><i><font size="-1" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">- 
          Jason &quot;loonyboi&quot; Bergman is the editor-in-chief here at <b>loonygames</b>. 
          He's really very normal once you get to know him.</font></i></p>
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      <p><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font></i><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><b>Credits:</b> 
        From the Mouth of Madness logo illustrated by and is &copy; 1999 Dan Zalkus. 
        From the Mouth of Madness is &copy; 1999 Jason Bergman. All other content 
        is &copy; 1999 <a target="_self" href="http://www.loonyboi.com">loonyboi 
        productions</a>. Unauthorized reproduction is strictly prohibited, so 
        don't do it...or we'll just forget about you. Let's see how <b>you</b> 
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