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        <h1><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><i><a href="../../index.html">loonygames</a><br>
          <font size="1">a <a href="http://www.bluesnews.com">blue's news</a> 
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<p><a href="../2.2/boag/index.html">&lt;&lt; Back to Normal View</a></p>
<p>URL: <a href="../2.2/boag/index.html">http://www.loonygames.com/content/2.2/boag/</a><br>
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<p>&nbsp;</p>Vol. 
                2, Issue 2<br>
                November 16, 1999<br>
                </b>
              <b> 
                </b>
              
                <b><i>Birth 

                  of a Gamer:</i></b></p>
                <b><i> 
                  Are you sure you want me to do this?</i></b></p>
                by 
                  Heather &quot;elki&quot; 
                  Haselkorn</p>
              
              

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               My 
                original intention was to stay as far away from loonygames as 
                possible. It just wasn't my scene, I didn't understand any of 
                it, and I just didn't care enough to, say, get pissed off about 
                Lara Croft. But I eventually found myself actually reading loonygames 
                and wanting to play some of the games that were mentioned in its 
                articles. On the whole, I thought it was very well done, even 
                though I still had no idea what was going on. Heck, I even wrote 
                in to the mailbag and won a t-shirt. </p>
              So when 
                loony called me and asked if I wanted to take over the &quot;Birth 
                of a Gamer&quot; column, my first response was yes. Followed by, 
                &quot;Are you sure you want me to do this,&quot; as though I'd 
                break the server or something. I guess part of my reaction was 
                because after months of being surrounded by his surreal world, 
                I sort of wanted in. I'd also finally have a legitimate reason 
                for spending hours in front of my computer for &quot;research&quot; 
                purposes. And of course, I can't deny the fact that I'm a pretentious 
                English major who just wants her own byline. Regardless of my 
                motives, here I am, writing what I hope will become a regular 
                column about gaming from a non-gamer's perspective. </p>
              </p>
              This column 
                isn't really giving birth to a gamer; it's more like a &quot;rebirth.&quot; 
                Up until the last couple of years of high school, I played lots 
                of games, mostly badly, and solely on consoles. When I was four 
                years old my dad bought me an Atari. Actually, I think he really 
                bought it for himself, but he told my mother it was for me and 
                my infant brother. I spent hours playing <b>Pac-Man</b>, <b>Donkey 
                Kong</b>, <b>Space Invaders</b>, you name it. I kept buying games 
                for that thing up until I was about twelve. I still quiver at 
                the memory of my mother throwing it away when we moved to a new 
                apartment. How I mourn the loss of my precious <b>Pong</b>! </p>
              </p>
              Anyway, 
                said Atari was eventually replaced by the NES. From then on I 
                realized that the only two games I'd ever be good at were <b>Super 
                Mario Bros.</b> and <b>Tetris</b>, which I now have again, thanks 
                to my Game Boy Color. Anyway, I played these games to exhaustion. 
                I think that this was also about that time (correct me if I'm 
                wrong--I probably am) that the wars began and new consoles seemed 
                to be coming out in droves at exorbitant prices. My parents couldn't 
                justify shelling out the money to buy these for me--they said 
                I should spend my time doing other things.</p>
              </p>
              You can 
                imagine my ire when they bought my brothers a Sega Genesis later 
                that year. Video games weren't an appropriate pastime for their 
                tree-climbing, baseball-playing, mud-stained daughter, yet my 
                brothers could take out all their aggression on a television screen 
                any time. This was the first time that I realized there was a 
                double standard when it came to video games. I don't think my 
                parents meant any harm. They were probably looking out for my 
                best interests, and trying to steer me toward &quot;girl&quot; 
                activities that were more socially acceptable. I almost hit the 
                roof when they bought my brothers a Super NES as well, but I eventually 
                gave up the battle and settled into getting my ass whooped by 
                a six-year-old. </p>
              </p>
              <br></p>
              My gaming 
                days began to wane during high school and finally came to an end 
                after my freshman year of college. I moved into my own apartment 
                and had to choose between buying games and eating. Since starving 
                to death would obviously not have been a good thing, I chose to 
                eat. I spent the next three years virtually gameless and clueless, 
                and the gamer in me died. Do you hear the violins? Do you feel 
                sorry for me yet? It's a sad story, one of the saddest, I tell 
                ya. But it does get better.</p>
              </p>
              In the 
                beginning of my senior year of college, I met our illustrious 
                editor, loony himself, in a history class. I thought he was insane. 
                I thought he was completely out of his mind. I thought he was 
                having a hell of a lot more fun than me. I mean, there he was, 
                carving out a career for himself, doing something that most of 
                us just do for fun. I was amazed that people could actually devote 
                their entire lives to developing, playing, and writing about games. 
                And that was just what they did for a living--after that they 
                went home and played more games! Adult men (and they are mostly 
                men) spent their entire lives doing this. </p>
              </p>
              Once again, 
                the double standard struck me. Where are all the women? Sure, 
                I know some women who love to play, but I've heard enough of loony's 
                stories about male-dominated LAN parties to wonder what happened 
                to the other half of the population. How many other women were 
                told when they were younger that they should find something more 
                appropriate to do with their free time? Things are a bit different 
                now, as it seems to be more acceptable for girls to play video 
                games and to learn how to use computers for more than just typing 
                papers. But that's about ten years too late for me, and for many 
                other women in their twenties and older. </p>
              </p>
              I have 
                to wonder, in fact, if it's any coincidence that the &quot;Birth 
                of a Gamer&quot; column is being written by a woman, and that 
                the person who did it before me was also a woman. This isn't due 
                to deliberate reinforcement of old stereotypes about how women 
                can't play games. Rather, it kind of turns out that way by default--how 
                many men in my age group can say that they've never played a video 
                game? So I guess it makes sense to have a woman write this column, 
                because it's much more common to meet women who are new to gaming. 
                </p>
              </p>
              When loony 
                asked me to write this column, it was because I was the only person 
                he knew who really could write it. My hiatus from gaming means 
                that I've missed out on so much development that I might as well 
                be starting from scratch. And it's true...some of the stuff I've 
                been seeing is absolutely amazing. I used to be able to pick up 
                a game and know exactly what to do with it. Now I'm so busy just 
                taking in what's on my screen that I have to remind myself to 
                actually play the darned thing.</p>
              </p>
              I don't 
                really have a plan for how I'm going to write this column. I'm 
                assuming I'll just get a bunch of games, play them, and write 
                what I think. If you don't like my rantings, well, sorry. I tend 
                to get very opinionated, like it or not. If you think I'm a complete 
                idiot, you're probably at least half-right. If my references are 
                dated and my terminology is, well, nonexistent, you'll just have 
                to forgive me. And I tend to digress into flowery prose that leads 
                nowhere. But hey, I'm a pretentious English major, and now I have 
                a byline. And yes, Lara Croft's perky breasts really do piss me 
                off. </p>
              <i>-Heather 
                &quot;elki&quot; Haselkorn 
                actually enjoys this.</i></p>
              </p>
              <br><p>&nbsp;</p> 
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<p><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">Credits: Print CGI is 
  &copy; 2000 <a href="http://www.square8.com">Square Eight</a>. Used with permission. 
  Article is &copy; 2000 its original author. All other content is &copy; 2000 
  loonyboi productions. Unauthorized reproduction is prohibited. You got that??</font></i></p>
 