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              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC">volume 
                1, issue 24</font></b></font></p>
              <p><font color="#0000FF"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0000CC"> 
                </font></b></font></p>
              <p>  <p><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono"><b><font color="#339900" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Today 
                in loonygames:</font></b></font></p>

<P><font color="#000000" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1">New!!</font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"> The Archives have been cleaned up, fead links fixed, and printable versions restored! Also, don't miss the new comments <a href="../../../index.html">on the front page</a>!</font></p>
              
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        <p align="LEFT"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color="#0022A8"><b><a target="" href="../../corner/index.html"><font size="-1">Behind 
          the Curtain</font></a><font size="-1">:</font></b></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="+3" color="#0022A8"><br>
          Mechanical Evolution <font size="+2">(part 2)</font></font></p>
        <p align="right"><font color="#804000"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">By 
          Matt &quot;<a href="mailto:thraka@xenocide.org">Thraka</a>&quot; Gilbert</font></b></font></p>
        <p align="right"> 
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        <p align="left"> <font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The information 
          you need at this point is never really put into a form that is easily 
          accessible. There will be databases, and newsgroups, and gurus, but 
          it comes down to this: you have to know what you are looking for before 
          you can find it, and in order to get to that point, you wind up making 
          a lot of mistaken assumptions, feeling stupid, rewriting code, wondering 
          why it still doesn’t work, posting messages, making phone calls, and 
          tearing your hair out when it <i>still</i> doesn’t work. Your producer 
          is looking at you strangely, since you told him this was going fine, 
          and suddenly it’s All Fucked Up, hereafter referred to as AFU. Don’t 
          be too upset: there’s a reason why ‘SN’ usually gets prepended to the 

          ‘AFU’. In truth, this <i>is</i> Situation Normal, but if you have an 
          ego (and who doesn’t in this business), it will no doubt be in considerable 
          pain. And if you have a team (again, who doesn’t), and a conscience 
          (if you don’t have one, you’ve already been launched long ago), you’re 
          feeling like you’re letting them down. Again, this is normal, and it’s 
          good.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">This is a baptism of fire: 
          you weren’t here in the beginning, so you missed your lumps the first 
          time around. Starting late, you take them all at once, instead of getting 
          them spaced out over several projects, but in the end, you get the same 
          amount. That’s the way it is. Don’t give up: you may feel like a poser, 
          but your team still believes in you, is <i>counting</i> on you, and 
          you’re not the idiot you think you are. This life is just <i>hard</i>, 
          bro. You’ll break through, I promise, or you wouldn’t be here. Eventually, 
          things start to become clear. You begin to understand the things the 
          gurus have internalized, and suddenly, the things they tell you make 
          sense. Once you get here, it’s the same old burn, heading towards a 
          master. Maybe this time, you’ll go see the Grand Canyon. You lost all 
          your money the last time you went to Vegas, anyway.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Okay, last part of this: 
          how does this differ from PC development? Well, again, there is the 
          temptation to say that PC programmers have it easier, and to a certain 
          extent, they do; they never really lose the wealth of their accumulated 
          knowledge as console programmers do. But, as I noted last time, nothing 
          is really easy in this business, and PC guys have their own troubles.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The biggest pain in the ass 
          for a PC programmer is without a doubt compatibility. PC programmers 
          have this little demon that always bites them in the ass, something 
          a console programmer never needs to sweat. When I lay down code on the 
          PlayStation, I never have to question if it will work for everyone who 
          uses it, except in some very special and predictable circumstances, 
          such as PAL/NTSC issues. Not so for our PC programmer. He often has 
          to deal with situations where code that runs fine on his system bombs 
          or displays subtle bugs on other machines. He has no idea what’s wrong; 
          in fact, quite often, it’s not even something under his control. Example: 
          when <b>Diablo</b> first hit the shelves, there were a bunch of people 
          frothing at the mouth, pissed off at Blizzard because their machine 
          crashed when they ran it. People were ranting about how the programmers 
          sucked, etc. But where did the problem lie? Not with <b>Diablo</b>: 
          in fact, most of the problems were with the IHVs. A number of video 
          card drivers did some really screwy things, i.e. were not fully compliant 
          with DirectX, and consequently, certain calls made them crash or behave 
          incorrectly. Sometimes, these problems don’t even show up in QA, and 
          then the programmers have to endure a hail of insults from the public. 
          Here’s a clue: next time you have the urge to blast the programmer because 
          a game crashes on your PC, step back, take a breath, and see if it’s 
          something else. The last thing any hard working programmer needs is 
          mail from an ungrateful, uninformed whiner suggesting he sucks and should 
          be fired. Artists don’t need this shit either, mind you, but the one 
          I know who gets this most often seems to be more than capable of handling 
          himself.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Okay, that’s all I can think 
          of on the topic, but that hardly means there isn’t more to say. If you’re 
          one of my PC counterparts, and you disagree with me on some of this, 
          or just have something to add, drop me some mail, and let’s rap. I’m 
          always interested in schmoozing.</font></p>
        <p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Next Time: The Impossible 
          Dream. How a perfectly reasonable schedule can be utterly destroyed 
          by a well meaning but unrealistic publisher!</font></p>
        <p>&nbsp; </p>
        <p align="RIGHT"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1"><i>- 
          Matt 'Thraka' Gilbert is a console programmer, currently working at 
          StormFront Studios. These are his own ravings, and have nothing whatsoever 
          to do with his employer.</i></font></p>
        <p align="LEFT"><i><font size="-1" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">.</font></i></p>
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    <td><i><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><b>Credits:</b> 
      Beaker's Bent logo illustrated by and is &copy; 1999 Dan Zalkus. Behind 
      the Curatain is &copy; 1999 Matt Gilbert. All other content is &copy; 1999 
      <a target="_self" href="http://www.loonyboi.com">loonyboi productions</a>. 
      Unauthorized reproduction is strictly prohibited, so don't do it. And ignore 
      the man behind the curtain. He's just got a shotgun aimed at your head...nothing 
      to get alarmed about.</font></i></td>
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